Heart of a Dog

This blog entry is dedicated to the memory of Tanner.

Tanner lived intensely and loved intensely. In four and a half years he summited all of the mountains within an hours drive of Burlington and was known to go on epic mountain bike rides 5+ hours with Caleb and his friends. Tanner always ran behind the lead biker's back tire and Sweety our other little dog was the caboose. His speed was phenomenal and he loved to chase squirrels, chipmunks and rabbits. We are almost certain that he left this world in hot pursuit of a great scent. We miss him dearly. Our friends and family knew what a special dog he was and we will cherish the love he shared with us during his all too brief time on earth -- Caroline.

Maurice is my neighbor's black dog. A mix of black lab and some other big dog. He spent a recent weekend with us, showing the purity of his heart. When left alone he was quiet and slept sprawled out on the floor wherever he lay. When approached, he wriggled with excitement. On one of our walks around Colchester Pond, we encountered some people who had two grown German Shepard puppies. They quickly established dominance over Maurice and had him quivering on his back, receiving their playful nips. With much growling and action, a casual onlooker might have seen this as an aggressive scene. Yet on closer inspection, I could see the attacks were just nips, and that the scene was one of play. The play helps the dogs to establish their social hierarchy. Maurice in his good nature submits to the more dominant energy of the other dogs. A social contract is formed with no blood spilled and no egos bruised. Maurice will not be going to his psychotherapist complaining of how two other dogs "beat him up" and the trauma of it all. Animals have play to, among others things, avoid violence. Humans sometimes confuse the two such as in the recent soccer violence in Italy. Perhaps we'd be better off if we were playing instead of just watching. The dog also lacks ego (self-importance), probably because they don't have enough of a frontal lobe in their brains to support it. This helps them to avoid the painful self-reflections that we are prone to. Dogs seem to be mostly limbic -- that is, ruled by the emotional center of the brain. They live on instinct and affection. My Rhodesian Ridgeback often appears to be pensive, even lugubrious, but dangle a milk bone in front of him or announce that there are squirrels in the vicinity and he becomes pure emotion -- attention ready for action. He goes from middle-age to puppyhood in a flash. I believe the dog's heart is pure, which is to say unentangled by abstract desires. If dogs can think about the future or the past, they certainly don't hold onto it. They return to the present with an ease that we should take note of, and to ask if we could live the same way.

I always get annoyed when I hear something on the news about innocent victims. What human is innocent? And what does this mean exactly? Whatever innocence is dogs embody it. Dogs can show some of the afflictions that we are prone to: desire and aversion in particular. Yet they seem to touch these briefly and return to the present. It's the rare dog that displays afflictive or negative emotions such as jealousy and aggression. They are innocent because they lack painful self-reflection and are oriented to attach. They are unabashedly hungry for both food and love. They retain a youthful view of the world even when they are aging. We can learn from their way of being in the world. For instance: never let an opportunity for a nap pass. As Wislawa Symborska, the Polish Nobel Laureate, says in her poem "In Praise of Feeling Bad for Yourself" the animals heart is light and conscience clear. There are no vexing thoughts or stories to get in the way of this moment; nothing to obstruct the bliss of sleep. We could learn something from this.

Are You A Buddhist? (part three)

Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse Rinpoche, author of What Makes You Not a Buddhist provides four criteria to consider. To be a Buddhist, one must believe in all four of these tenets or seals. These are: 1) all compounded things are impermanent, 2) all emotions are pain, 3) all things have no inherent existence, and 4) nirvana is beyond all concepts.

Let's continue with number three: "All things have no inherent existence." What could this possibly mean? Things certainly feel real, don't they? Isn't this just some kind of Buddhist double-talk? Physics may provide a clue. The objects we interact with every moment of our lives, including the bodies we have are mostly made of space. Each atom is mostly space. The appearance of solidity is provided by the energy of the circulating electrons and other particles of each atom. At the quantum, sub-atomic, level things get really weird and unpredictable, yet the world of objects we inhabit follows the laws of physics. Richard Dawkins calls the world we inhabit "middle world." Middle world, however, is not the absolute nature of things but only its relative nature. A physicist at the University of Buffalo once told me that if all the space was taken out of atoms the universe would be the size of a bowling ball. The entire universe! Perhaps this is what the Buddha meant by "all things have no inherent existence" even though he did not have the scientific knowledge to prove it. What are the implications of this lack of inherent existence? For one, I think it means we should not take ourselves or our situations so seriously. The universe is simply made of space! It's all empty. Another implication is this emptiness that I just mentioned. What is emptiness? Beyond the layers and textures of desire lies bare existence. This emptiness is considered to be luminous but lacking any solidity. The implication stemming from the Buddha's teachings is thus generosity. Generosity? When we no longer cling to things as me and mine, we are free to be more generous. When we no longer put vast amounts of energy into protecting things with no inherent existence we are lighter (that is, less self-important as noted above), and more generous. To read further:


To learn more about Dongsar Khyentse Rinpoche, please visit his website Siddhartha's Intent.

Are You A Buddhist? (part two)

Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse Rinpoche, author of What Makes You Not a Buddhist provides four criteria to consider. To be a Buddhist, one must believe in all four of these tenets or seals. These are: 1) all compounded things are impermanent, 2) all emotions are pain, 3) all things have no inherent existence, and 4) nirvana is beyond all concepts.

2) All emotions are pain. Certainly pleasure would not be included. But Rinpoche says "all." But how could pleasure be pain? Every experience contains its own end, especially pleasurable experiences. We may want to hold onto pleasure; to not let it go. Trying to hold on contains the seeds of dissatisfaction or dukkha. Dukkha (often translated as "suffering") pervades everything that we have a vested interest in. Whenever we are awake to what is happening this arising and passing away becomes apparent, painfully apparent. Once again this is impermanence, the first of Rinpoche's criteria. I am inclined to agree that desire, if I can rephrase slightly, is tinged with pain. This principle leads to a misconception about the Buddhist approach. Is Rinpoche advocating an emotionless and desireless way of being? I don't think this is exactly accurate. It would be more accurate to say that we can become more flexible with our emotions and desires. It would be less painful if we could have fewer expectations. Another misconception claims that having fewer expectations results in having fewer goals. Not necessarily so. We still aim towards goals; we still act in the world. When things don't go as expected we respond to reality proactively. What becomes absent is the self-referencing drama about how we didn't get what we wanted, how the world is cruel and capricious, and how the future is irrevocably tarnished.

Another way to interpret this seal is to look at the meaning of "emotion." In a chapter written with my late mentor, Terrance Brown, M.D., a distinction is made between emotions and feelings. Emotions are highly charged and disruptive experiences, both positive and negative. They arise when our capacities to cope are overwhelmed. The emotions restore equilibrium albeit in a primitive and expensive way. As we develop through infancy into adulthood, we become less emotional; emotions arise less often because we have more sophisticated ways of coping with situations (namely intelligence). Feelings in contrast to emotions are ubiquitous and serve the function of helping us to navigate in an uncertain world. Confusion arises because all emotions contain intense feelings but not all feelings rise to level of emotions. By making this distinction between emotions and feelings, we can now revisit the seal "all emotions are pain." This certainly would be the case. Emotions by their very nature are painful because they arise when we can't cope with reality in that moment. They are primitive, disruptive, and expensive. The goal of emotional development is to get rid of emotions altogether and to refine our capacity to use feelings and intelligence to problem solve.

(Brown, Terrance A., and Arnold Kozak. 1998. Emotion and the possibility of psychologists entering into heaven. In What develops in emotional development?, ed. Michael F. Mascolo and Sharon Griffin, 135-155. New York: Plenum Press. )

Are you a Buddhist?

I often get asked this question, and I usually go through a song and dance with caveats and qualifications. I am reminded of Larry Rosenberg in this way. Once after giving a long preamble, his wife said to him, "why not just say yes?" In 1985, I took the Bodhisattva vows from His Holiness the Dalai Lama. By doing so, I vowed to attained enlightenment for the benefit of all sentient beings. This sounds fairly Buddhist. But my rational, empirical, and skeptical self brings up objections. What about rebirth? I don't believe in that. As a skeptic, I would need to see evidence. What about karma? Again, show me the evidence. There is much in Buddhism that is prescientific, as one would expect about a set of teachings that are 2500 years old. His Holiness recently gave the keynote address at the annual neuroscience meeting . See the Washington Post article here.

""What relation could there be between Buddhism, an ancient Indian philosophical and spiritual tradition, and modern science?" he said. His answer was that the scientific empirical approach and the Buddhist exploration of the mind and world have many similarities."

When asked what he would do if science contradicted Buddhist belief, he said he would alter his Buddhist beliefs. This is a striking statement for a religious leader to make, and I can think of no other who would dare to make such a statement. In his case, it is not just a statement; he walks to the talk. For more on the relationship between Buddhism and science see his memoir on science:


But I digress. From his Holiness's example, we see a compatibility between science and Buddhism, and this makes me feel more comfortable. At a practical level, I endeavor to live my life in accordance with Buddhist ideals and principles such as do no harm (trying, but not always successful) and cultivating the mind through meditation. From the outside perspective, it certainly looks as though I am a Buddhist.

Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse Rinpoche, author of What Makes You Not a Buddhist provides four criteria to consider. To be a Buddhist, one must believe in all four of these tenets or seals. These are: 1) all compounded things are impermanent, 2) all emotions are pain, 3) all things have no inherent existence, and 4) nirvana is beyond all concepts.

Do I qualify on these grounds? Let's take a look at these criteria one by one. "All compounded things are impermanent." Show me something that is permanent? All things seem to be changing; what stays the same? Things are constantly changing; much of life is comprised of rhythms such as breathing, eating, digesting, sleeping and waking. We're never done. Things never stay clean or organized. Everything moves towards disorganization and decay unless we leverage energy against it. Even in the big picture, the universe is not static. It's expanding at at some future time will cease to exist. This sounds pretty impermanent, so I'd have to agree with Rinpoche on this point. Next: "all emotions are pain." I'll take this up in a future blog entry. Stay tuned!

To learn more about Dongsar Khyentse Rinpoche, please visit his website Siddhartha's Intent.

Cold Buddha Shivers ... and Smiles!

14 degrees in Burlington and it feels colder with a stiff breeze scaling the hill from the lake. The wind bites like a teething puppy. It's easy to mistake this attention as personal. "How dare you get in my face like this," the mind muses. The next morning the mercury stumbles out of bed, still half asleep at 12 degrees below zero. It was once thought that cold was a substance added to things like air and water. If cold is a substance it could slap us in the face. But, of course, cold isn't a substance. The air and water are the same as on a sunny summer day. It's all a matter of motion. Cold is slow, and if it gets really slow, like absolute zero slow (minus 273 degrees centigrade), some bizarre things start to happen (Bose-Einstein condensates). But I digress. Short of situations with a risk for hypothermia, we are free to approach cold in a more playful way. We can quiet the complaining mind and investigate how the cold actually feels. Not the concept of the cold, but the actual phenomenon of cold happening in the present. It was said that the hot Buddha sweats and the cold Buddha shivers. I would add that we can shiver with a smile. By making contact with the actual cold instead of the concept of cold, we can transform the experience from a difficult one into a pleasant or a neutral one. Equanimity from the Pali "upekkha" can also be translated as "interest." When we can bring a genuine and abiding interest to something we can also be even minded and alleviate suffering. The body is shivering and cold, and the mind is unaffected by this state of the body. With this sort of interest we relinquish expectations, agendas, and petty desires for comfort and ease. Today the mercury is soaring and the snow is melting. Hot Buddha sweats. The changing weather reminds us of impermanence, but that is a story for another day.

Polly Young-Eisendrath

I have the pleasure of teaching from one of Polly Young-Eisendrath's texts this semester (The Psychology of Mature Spirituality). Polly is a colleague and friend, who is an authority on feminism, Jungian analysis, and the interface between Zen and psychotherapy. She is a sought after speaker, and her next public conference will be at Harvard this spring: Click here for conference information ... Polly will also be presenting at the Omega Institue in Rhinebeck New York this summer at a conference entitled Love & Relationships: What the Buddhists Teach along with Silvia Boorstein, John Tarrant, and Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche. Click here for workshop information ...

Polly's latest book, forthcoming in the next few months is entitled "The Self-Esteem Trap: Raising Confident and Compassionate Kids in an Age of Self-Importance" which chronicles the difficulties of the current young generation and seeks to undertand this dissatisfaction from a psychological and cultural perspective. You can learn more about the Self-Esteem Trap and Polly at Polly's website ...

Below is a selected list of Polly's published books with descriptions and links to purchase on Amazon.



Awakening and Insight: "The intersection of East and West is a vital one on many levels. The efforts to integrate Buddhism and its therapeutic ancestors to the Western ideas of Jungian Psychology have been particularly fruitful. Taking Japanese Zen-Buddhism as its starting point, Awakening and Insight is a collection of critiques and histories of Buddhism from a psychological perspective. Based on accounts of the Buddhism and Depth Psychology conference that took place in Kyoto in 1999, this volume serves to unite the cousins of Eastern religion and Western thought. Featuring a new translation of the historic conversation between Schinichi Hisamatsu and Carl Jung which took place in 1958, Awakening and Insight will be of great interest to anyone interested in Psychology and Buddhism."



Women and Desire: "In providing some answers to Freud's famous question about what women really want, Young-Eisendrath draws on her experience as a psychotherapist and on ideas gleaned from Buddhism, Jung and feminist writings. She argues that most women don't have a clue about what they want because society has programmed them simply to want to present a desirable image. Illustrating her thesis with mythic tales and case studies of her own patients, the author shows how our culture recognizes two female stereotypes: the beautiful muse and the ugly hag-bitch who wields power to fulfill her own desires. Women should not be objects of desire, but subjects of desire, she writes, not only in personal relationships but in the workplace. While women may believe that competence leads to success at work, she contends that "what leads to power is self-promotion, making the right connections and being self-confident." According to Young-Eisendrath, women's rampant consumerism, shoplifting and binge eating are simply manifestations of unconscious desires. Although she contends that established religions have subordinated women, the author advocates learning to distinguish pathological desires from authentic ones through traditional spiritual practices or New Age feminist communities. She treads on familiar ground, but Young-Eisendrath writes with authority, offering women a valuable perspective on understanding and changing self-defeating behaviors."



Psychology of Mature Spirituality: "Split into three sections - integrity, wisdom and transcendence the book describes and analyses a mature form of "skeptical spiritually" that will be a hallmark of future years. Analytical psychology text addressing the question of how to reconcile spiritual and religious practices with intelligence and rationality, two hallmarks of the secular age. Combines developmental and depth psychology with religious studies to create a concept of 'skeptical spirituality."



You're Not What I Expected: "Along with reciprocal trust and shared power, dialogue between equals "on a personal and public level" is essential to the experience of full intimacy in heterosexual relationships. So argues Jungian therapist and feminist Young-Eisendrath ( Hags and Heroes ) in this persuasive guide. In accessible language, she demonstrates that culture, not biology, promotes the gender-based stereotypes that, along with shattered dreams, often prevent couples from establishing true intimacy. The reader sits in on intensive sessions of "dialogue therapy" as practiced by the author and her social worker husband, Ed Epstein, with four composite couples. In addition to aiding the husbands and wives in facing their own and each other's limitations and negative feelings, these dialogues are intended to foster "mature dependence" and to lead the couples to the recognition that attachment and suffering go together."



The Gift of Suffering: "Psychotherapist Young-Eisendrath (The Cambridge Companion to Jung, Morrow, 1993) combines insights of Jungian psychology and Buddhist meditation to fashion a reflection on the creativity of suffering and loss. Through the stories of several individuals who gained new perspectives on self and the world through a creative use of their suffering, Young-Eisendrath constructs a journey of resilience and renewal that involves compassion, Jungian alchemy, and selflessness."

Reslient Spirit



Hags and Heroes



Cambridge Companion to Jung



Gender and Desire